yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
