I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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