My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
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In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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