well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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