is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
