Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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