So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
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