Me. At least after what I've been through.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Semen is not good for contacts.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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