He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i dont even know how to be here
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
All the doctor said was why
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
