I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
