Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Randomize
