My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
