Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
