doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
why do cheetos always look like penises
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
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