dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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