i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
