Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
