I can tuck mytits in my pants
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Congratulations! We have a period
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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