would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
