I wish i was in the wii world.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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