South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
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