also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize