Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I think I sprained my soul last night
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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