For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
