Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
