I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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