OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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