so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Farmville is her only friend.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
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