how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
