Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
