It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
