420 ftw
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
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