I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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