im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
It was like getting head from an anaconda
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
