Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
