No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
