I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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