He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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