if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I got her a Nickelback box set.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
