elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
