he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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