i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
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theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
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So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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