plz talk dirty to me
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
