sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
