it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
