yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
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