You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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