Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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