haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
