I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize