wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
